MARATHON UPDATE - The Big Day

This was supposed to be my first and last, one and only, marathon...

It's Thursday here. I went for a short run this morning, for the first time since Sunday's race. It was nice to get back out there, after trying to allow my body enough recovery time. I honestly felt like I could have returned to running a day earlier, but no need to push myself more than necessary.

I wasn't afraid things might be different following my race experience, but it was good to realize that nothing much had change. I restrained myself from running faster and longer than I had planned, keeping in mind the plan to ease back into a routine.

I'm no longer devastated, sad, or disappointed...but I am a little annoyed and very determined.

Because I had fully intended for the 2016 Tokyo Marathon to be my one and only full marathon race.

 ...and now I have to do another one!


PRE-RACE
 The week before race day, I spent a lot of time planning my final runs and workouts, my carbohydrate-rich meals, my water intake, race-day outfits, my plan for how I was going to tackle 26.2 miles/42 kilometers, and everything else that went along with it.

Since Tokyo is a little under two hours away from where we live, we decided to spend the night before the race in the city, and also the following day to give me time to recover and to just enjoy a little family time. So I packed our suitcase, my race bag and items that we needed for the kids. We reserved one room at the hotel, but in hind-sight it might have been better to have a suite or two rooms. That extra room might have helped me get more than a couple hours of sleep the night before. Then again, with all the jittery excitement I was feeling, maybe not.

I was excited and ready to get it done!

RACE DAY
The morning of the race, I "woke up" around 5:00 a.m. and started getting myself ready to go. I packed the bag they provided us with the clothes I would change into after the race. I prepared myself a breakfast meal of whole wheat bagel and peanut butter, along with a banana and some water. The girls were still sleeping, and I woke my husband so we could pray together before I headed out. He would come along with the kids a little later, closer to the start time.

I headed out the door and made my way to the train station. I saw a few fellow racers along the way, some trying to catch a short nap on the early morning commute. A couple short train rides later, we arrived at the stop that would take us to our starting gate. Volunteers held up signs in Japanese and English, helping us head in the right direction. My gate was #5 (there were 6 entry gates total, to keep any one entrance from getting too congested). Once we went through security, everyone went to do whatever they needed to before the race.

I had just finished eating my breakfast as I was walking towards the entry gate, and went to find the designated truck that would take my belongings to the finish area. After a trip to the potty, I went to find my starting block "J". I had arrived early along with thousands of runners, and ended up being at the very front of my starting block. Still, I was somewhere in the middle of the 36,000 runners...but closer to the back than to the front. Across the street from where I stood I could see late comers rushing to find the entry gate. I could already see that some runners had chosen colorful, full-on costumes to run in. Spectators were lining up all along the roadside.

A few people had told me to have fun, when they were wishing me well on my marathon debut. At the time, in my mind, I thought I would be mostly trying to focus on my race and not really trying to have fun. But it was hard not to have fun, with all the excitement of everyone around me. An elderly Japanese gentleman who had been standing to my left for some time, had finally worked up the nerve to converse in English with me. He politely asked where I was from and how many races I had run. This was his 5th marathon! After a few more questions, we both turned away to do some stretching and a little movement to keep us warm. Though we were all a little cold in the 50-60 degree weather, the sun was out and there was not a cloud in the sky. One might have wished for a little overcast skies, but at least the famously fierce Japanese wind was fairly calm.

After waiting for over and hour, we could finally hear the announcements over the loud speaker, indicating that we needed to be on our mark. We were so far back, that we could not see the starting line at all. As helicopters circled overhead, we clearly heard the starting gun, and could also hear the bang of fireworks and what turned out to be confetti hearts. It took us about 15-20 minutes to get to the official starting line, during which time we walked fairly slowly. I was already feeling the urge to visit the potty, after two hours since my last visit. But I was determined that I was going to get a few kilometers under my belt before I made my one and only stop during the race.

Finally, around the 2nd or 3rd kilometer mark, the congestion had dispersed enough where we could start running. My GPS watch didn't work for the first 40 minutes of the race. Maybe it was because so many thousands of people were setting their watches and phones at the same time? I didn't worry about it. I figured it would eventually start working. Meanwhile, I looked around at the crowd gathered to cheer us on. Their excitement for us was infectious. If they saw that you might possibly be an English-speaker they would say, "You can do it!" and "Don't give up!" They would get even more excited when a runner would come over and give a high-five to their outstretched hands. Over and over they would say "Ganbatte!", which means "good luck".  There was one group holding a sign with a bull's-eye that said "Touch here for power". So of course I had to go over and touch that one!

There were so many awesome spectators along the way, it's hard to remember them all. But one that sticks out in my mind is this elderly Japanese lady. She was yelling a phrase over and over, and though I didn't understand what she was saying, she caught my attention. I tried to stay mostly over to one side and avoid the middle of the pack. Since I was close enough to reach her, I went over and gave her a high-five. She got even more excited and started yelling even louder. That really put a smile on my face.

Along with the energy of the crowd, the sights of the city definitely provided a welcome distraction. Tokyo is a wonderful mixture of modern technology, and centuries-old architecture and land marks. All along the way, there were different entertainers performing songs and dances; Taiko drum players, hula dancers, choirs, and a very official looking band near the imperial palace.

And then there were the racers who came in costume. I saw some really amazing things out there! Some of the costumes...I have no idea what they were supposed to be. But they were all thoroughly entertaining. I saw a Jedi with Yoda on his back, princesses, brides, superheroes, and so much more. There were even  a few people who were barefoot or running in sandals and traditional clothing.

In my mind, I was running a pretty good race. I was focused on not going much faster than I had in my training. I was determined to save my energy for the last few miles. I was determined that I was not going to burn out before the end. At every 5k, there were checkpoints and time clocks to warn you of cut-off times. My GPS was finally working, and I was within my target pace. The time starts when the gun goes off, and not when you actually cross the start line. Those of us who were already at the back of the pack, were at a bit of a disadvantage with that.  I never stopped once, after my potty break at the first couple miles. I slowed down for planned walk breaks and fluid stations. I was feeling good and felt great about my ability to finish the race. I was ahead of the time cut-off at every checkpoint I passed. It was awesome to see my family and friends at the first major turn, and again at the halfway point.

All smiles and waving at the 10k turn

Still smiling at the halfway point

Before the race, when friends would ask if I was ready, I would say "as ready as I can be". I also kept saying that the only way I wouldn't finish the race, is if the officials took me out.

And then, like a self-fulfilling prophesy...that is just what happened. Between the 23-27 kilometer points, there was no water or electrolyte fluid to be had. The sun was sapping runners' energy left and right. Finally we came upon a water station, and were able to replenish. Feeling a little more energized, as I got closer to the 29k station, the crowd of runners was thinning out even more. I was focused on getting to the 30k mark. I started to plan how I was going to increase my speed a little bit more, to really starting eating through the last 12k/8 miles. I could see the big 30k sign right around the corner. I looked down, to keep the sun out of my face and to push through the next few meters.

Just as I was looking up again, I can remember seeing the bottom of the shoes of the racers in front of me. In the very next moment, a line of officials ran out in front of me, separating me from the runners right in front of me, and blocking my way from continuing. I was in shock. I remember saying "no" with an incredulous feeling. As I fully realized what had just happened, I burst into tears. The officials were trying to say something to those of us who they had stopped, but I was too focused on the sadness and devastation I felt in that moment. I felt a tug on my bib, as an official ripped of the side of the bib, indicating that I was not a finisher. After a few moments of crying into my hands, I called my husband on my cell phone. I knew he would already be waiting for me at the finish line, along with our friends. It took a few minutes for him to understand what I was trying to say through my tears. I just kept saying "they made me stop".

We waited for the big yellow tour bus that would take us to the finish area. We sat silently on the bus, watching other runners file onto other waiting buses, mirroring the dejection I was feeling. I just kept thinking, "There's so much time left!!" and "I could still be out there running". It seemed to take an eternity for us to get to the finish area. To add insult to injury, a monitor in the bus continued to broadcast the ongoing race.

As we were dropped off to the baggage area, we were handed packages containing fruit, a sandwich, water, and some other stuff. Making my way to the spot where I would pick up my clothes, I could hear cheering for the finishers as they were coming through an entrance at the other end of the huge holding area. Runners passed by, with their medals draped around their necks and "finisher" towels around their shoulders. Each one I saw just increased my sadness.

After changing into my post-race outfit, compression socks, and comfy sandals, I made the long trek to the family meeting area. All along the way I communicated with my husband, where I was and where we were going to meet. When I finally got through the crowd and saw him, I walked into his comforting hug, and once again allowed myself to cry. He hugged me tight and comforted me as only he can. After I dried my tears, we made our way over to where our girls and our friends were waiting for us. It was very healing to hear their words of encouragement and receive their hugs.

Later on, we said goodbye to our friends, and then went to find a good spot for my post-race meal. After all, I had just run over 18 miles, and was beginning to feel ravenous. After a belly full of food, it was easier not to cry over what had happened. The ice cream I ate later that evening also helped to sooth my wounded spirit. I had given up ice cream 6 months ago, at the beginning of my training.

Over the next couple days, my husband listened patiently as I went over and over the experience. Speaking words of wisdom and helping me analyze the experience, he helped me to get to a place where I could actually laugh about things. No longer feeling sad and dejected, I was now experiencing a little anger and feeling indignant. I just knew in my heart and mind that I was going to finish that race. And for someone, anyone, to get in my way and stop me from achieving that goal, burned me to my very core.

Throughout this whole experience, from the beginning of my training, in all that I did...I wanted to glorify God and be an encouragement to others along the way. I though that once I finish this race, I could encourage others to do things they never thought they could do. I could be an example of what determination can accomplish. I could encourage others to get out there and set goals for themselves.

And I can still do that! I don't know why circumstances worked out in a way that resulted in me not finishing this race. But I praise God all the same. The answers to our questions do not always come right away. But my faith remains. Maybe an answer will come in time. Maybe it was just the journey that was important. I've definitely learned some things along the way.

As much as my desire was to encourage others, what I never expected was how the encouragement of others would impact me. During my training, on race day, and in the wake of my experience, I have received so many messages of love from my family and friends. People telling me that they are proud of all that I have accomplished, and how I have motivated them. These words mean so much to me!!

In this life, there will be many things that come along and try to physically and metaphorically block us. There will be experiences and individuals that try to discourage us. That is why encouragement is so important. Lifting each other up in prayer, through kind and meaningful words, through hugs, through just being there! We all need that, at some point. And praise God, HE never gives up on us. We might take a while to achieve our goals, we might stumble, we might not run the race of life according to the world's standards...but I praise God for HIS grace. I praise HIM for the people he has placed in my life, to uplift and support and love me. I praise HIM, that HE never gives up on me!

Now, more than ever, I want to be the one who lifts up others through my words and actions.

I encourage each of you to do the same in your life. Whoever is around you...family, friends, coworkers, schoolmates...you never know what one small kindness can do for someone else.

When I started this blog entry, I didn't intend for it to be so lengthy! But I don't know how I could have left any part of this experience out.

Despite the let down of not being able to complete mt first marathon attempt, as I was writing this I realized just how much I enjoyed the experience. I might have taken it for granted if I had finished. I most likely would not have thoughts that I do now, of competing in another full marathon.

Though completing a full marathon was not on my original bucket list, it is definitely a goal that I will now be working towards.

And I leave you with this thought...

Don't ever let anything discourage you from achieving your goals. We will all have setback at some point, but it's not the setbacks that define you, but what you decide to do about it!